From booze-swilling, dance-floor owning party animals through to those on a strict schedule of eat, sleep, sightsee, repeat, there are a number of common travel types. Some you will love, others you will loathe but, travel enough and you’re bound to come across each of them at some point. So, are you one of these 10 weird and wonderful travellers?
1. Legit Backpacker
Sporting a backpack twice their size, it’s impossible to know exactly where the legit backpacker actually comes from, but it’s most likely somewhere in Europe. The legit backpacker knows how to work the inside of a hostel like a professional, with absolutely no fear whatsoever. They’re so experienced at travelling they don’t even need to try anymore, relying solely on their instincts to guide them. Read TripAdvisor reviews? Puh-lease! Book a hotel room? Don’t make me laugh. Use a suitcase with wheels? Not on your life – the legit backpacker could weave a new backpack out of their own body hair if they wanted to.
For the model, no visit to… well, anywhere really, is complete without a photo-shoot. I mean, if it isn’t shared on Instagram, did it really even happen? Ah, no. The model can be found snapping selfies with their breakfast, lunch, and dinner in between posing for photos of them in, on and around absolutely anything they come across: garden beds, pool inflatables, sunsets, statues and walls. Their post-holiday photo album will consist of a minimum 100 photos posted to Facebook, comprising 50 per cent selfies and 50 per cent photos of them doing… well, nothing. The first things the model will pack is their top five favourite swimsuits (as voted by Instagram likes), tanning oil and a selfie stick. Note: they usually travel in packs of 2 or more.
Having spent a considerable amount of time researching, cross-referencing and strategically planning every moment of their upcoming vacation, you’ll find the planner knows absolutely everything about each destination. The planner loves a good label-maker and/or laminator and is quite the app aficionado. You’ll find them out and about at every opportunity, making the most of every second. While you’ve been sleeping, they’ve already seen the sunrise, climbed a mountain, visited four museums and snuck in a workout. For the planner, there’s no such thing as a rest and, if there were, it would be expertly scheduled at an appropriate time for an appropriate length. Their motto: You can sleep when you’re dead.
4. Go With The Flow Traveller
For every yin, there is a yang, which means for every planner there is a go with the flow traveller. Your standard GWTFT is not set on arriving at a destination, they’re focused on the journey, man. They’re commonly found milling about South-East Asia, linking up with other travellers to see where the world leads them. An expert at train travel, the GWTFT is usually charismatic and makes friends easily.
5. Bigger, Better, Best, Traveller
You’ll know when you’ve met a BBB traveller because they’ll be annoying the absolute crap out of you. While the rest of you are happily sharing your favourite travel stories, the BBB will be jumping in to tell a story that quite obviously beats yours. Remember the time you went to London? Well, that’s a flaming bag of dog turds compared to the time they went because they partied with Harry Styles and Kate Moss and did body shots off Cara Delevigne while reading a first edition Mark Twain and booking flights to Switzerland with the rich, London sociallite they met.
6. Cultural Explorer
Favouring destinations with a rich history, the cultural explorer knows more about a city than the tour guide does. They’ve read the books, seen the movie and done the research. Spouting anecdotes and sharing stories you didn’t ask to hear, the cultural explorer has seen parts of the world you didn’t even know existed. Often spotted exploring historically significant sites throughout Europe, the cultural explorer knows that to find the true hidden gems of travel, you have to go the extra mile. Usually, wears clothing in varying tones of beige and green purchased from an actual outdoor apparel store. May or may not be wearing sandals and socks.
7. Adrenaline Junky
Whether they’re shredding the gnarly slopes, whizzing around on a jet ski or jumping off a bridge or out of a plane, the adrenaline junky is always, ALWAYS busy. They’ve almost certainly got a GoPro and spend most of their time outdoors doing things usually reserved for bucket lists. After a big day of wild behaviour and maximum energy output, you’ll find them drinking beer, eating burgers and looking for a hot tub to relax in. The adrenaline junky is lovable and also a little bit mad, which is probably what makes them so loveable. Favours snow and beach-centric destinations.
As a general rule, the sleeper sees vacations as a chance to catch up on their naps, sleep-ins, shut-eye, kips and snoozes. You’ll find them curled up in bed, sprawled out on a pool chair or dozing peacefully in a hammock. A connoisseur of tropical destinations, the sleeper is usually a devout reader of the Economist. The sleeper adheres to a strict schedule of sleeping in, demolishing the buffet breakfast, napping by the pool, having lunch, catching some afternoon winks then re-emerging for dinner. They favour Hawaiian shirts and John Grisham novels. (Yes, I just described my dad).
9. Namaste Traveller
You’ll find the namaste traveller sporting an almost unbelievably great body, potentially adorned with tattoos, owing mostly to the amount of pilates and/or yoga they do. They’re incredibly flexible, laid back and know where to find the best vegan food in the area. The namaste traveller dresses comfortably and feels most at home in South-East Asia, sipping on kombucha and reconnecting with Mother Earth. You’ll find them eating off a banana leaf in India, meditating in Bali or practicing their King Pigeon in Sri Lanka.
10. Luxury Traveller
Easily identifiable by the expensive, matching luggage they’re sporting and the actual outfits or ‘looks’ they’re wearing, the luxury traveller prefers their vacation destinations warm and their yachts large. You won’t find them anywhere within a 1,000-mile radius of a hostel or the inside of a hotel with anything below a 5-star rating. The luxury traveller believes Airbnb is the new beauty cremé by Yves Saint Laurént and only flies first-class, darling.
Little Grey Box